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UPTIME
Uptime Guarantee LLC$99.99▼ -99.99%
We guarantee 99.9% uptime. The remaining 0.1% is when you need us most.
6 Month Performance
Key Statistics
Market Cap
$99.90M
P/E Ratio
99.9
52-Week High
$999.99
52-Week Low
$9.99
Volume
5 nines (aspirational)
Dividend Yield
Status page updates
CEO
Pager McPageface
HQ
On Call, 24/7, Everywhere
Analyst Ratings
SLA SallyIncident Response Capital
Hold (Your Breath) ➡“Their status page says everything is operational. Their Twitter says otherwise.”
Postmortem PaulRoot Cause Analysis LP
Underperform (But With Passion) ⬇“They wrote a blameless postmortem. Then blamed the intern.”
Canary CarlaGreen Check Ventures
Pivot Immediately ⬆“The monitoring is down but the alerts about monitoring being down are working great.”