news

Coinbase Makes Desperate Plea for Fiat Currency

(Wall Street, New York) Coinbase is asking the public to help it acquire hundreds and hundreds of millions of dollars of fiat currency in USD today. The bold move comes via a direct listing on the NASDAQ stock exchange and just as Bitcoin and other popular cryptocurrencies have experienced a wave of enormous interest and all-time-high prices. Many thought Coinbase would choose to avoid an IPO or direct listing, given popular and pervading views on the future of money within the cryptocurrency community. But it appears that fiat currency and lots of it is what Coinbase needs at the moment. Brian Armstrong, CEO of Coinbase, had this to say about the direct listing: “We literally have no… Read more

news

Suez Canal Adds Bumper Rails, to Deploy Clifford the Big Red Dog

(Suez, Egypt) The ship is still very much stuck. That ship, the Ever Given, is a massively-large container vessel traversing the Suez Canal in Egypt. At time of writing, the ship has been stuck for 4 days, 13 hours and 2 minutes and has created…

social media

Twitter Launches Super Unfollow

(San Francisco, CA) Twitter announced today that it would roll out a handful of new features over the next few quarters aimed at increasing monetization. Major social media networks like Twitter and Facebook have recently faced increased pressure to…

tech

Jeff Bezos Ousted From Amazon By r/wallstreetbets

Seattle, WA — Founder and CEO of Amazon ($AMZN) Jeff Bezos announced that he will be stepping down from his role as CEO of Amazon. The unexpected move was announced during Amazon’s most recent earnings report. Amazon reported its first $100 billion…

news

GameStop To Offer Stock Trade-In Program

(Grapevine, TX) - GameStop has been making headlines in and out of the financial markets over the past week after its stock price was sent soaring by retail traders. The stock was trading at the $15-$20 level as recently as late 2020, but has hit…

news

Zoom To Launch Streaming Service

(San Jose, CA) - Video conferencing software company Zoom is apparently looking for new worlds to conquer. After completely dominating the video conferencing space, the company has announced that it will be launching an online-only streaming service…

news

Zoom Wins 'Malware Of The Year' Award for March 2020

(San Jose, CA) - Video conferencing software company Zoom has seen a massive surge in popularity with the Covid-19 pandemic as many workers embrace social distancing and work remotely. Just how big that surge is now clear: "March this year, we…

cloud computing

AWS Launches Mimic: Open-Source Ripoff As-A-Service

(Seattle, WA) - Sources inside Amazon Web Services (AWS) tell us that AWS is in the process of gearing up to launch a new service: Mimic. Focused on rapidly copying open-source projects and spinning up competitive services, Mimic started as an…

news

Google Lays Off 50% of Staff as April Fools' Day Cancelled

(Mountain View, CA) - Google was compelled to lay off around 10% of it's staff today after the official cancellation of April Fools' Day this year. WIth national and international morale at a low due to the Covid-19 pandemic, there was little…

The Latest

Oracle Migration to Austin to Take Place Over Next 100 Years

(San Francisco, CA) - Another longtime corporate resident of the San Francisco Bay Area is leaving town. Oracle, maker of acronym-based software (CRM, ERP, HCM, SCM, and more) as well as database technology is pulling up roots and moving to Austin…

Facebook to Acquire 48 States, FTC

(Menlo Park, CA) - The U.S. government and 48 state attorneys general filed wide-ranging antitrust lawsuits against Facebook on Wednesday, arguing for the breakup of the social-networking giant anti-competitive practices. The legal move has been…

Airbnb IPO Shares to Include 'Cleaning Fee'

(San Francisco, CA) - 2020 has been an interesting year for tech IPOs. Many would have expected a complete or near-complete freeze in companies going public with the pandemic ravaging global markets. Yet in true 2020 fashion, the opposite has…

Thousands of 'Smaller, More Scalable' Microliths Appear Around the World

(USA) - The year 2020 hasn't been dull; if anything, it has been increasingly full of surprises. In the latest strange turn of events, a number of large metal monoliths have appeared across the globe in remote places. The sightings have ranged from…

Coinbase Employees Completely Unaware of Election

(San Francisco, CA) - For many workers, today (the day after Election Day), was a difficult day productivity-wise. Many vote totals are stilling counted in key states at time of writing. People everywhere are turning to Twitter and other social media…

Amazon Launches Ring Security Prime

(Seattle, WA) - Amazon launched a slew of new products as part of its fall hardware event on September 24, including expansions of the Echo, Eero, and Ring product lines. Spherical speakers, an Echo Show with a front-facing camera, and Eero routers…

Oracle Launches TikTok Enterprise Edition

(San Francisco, CA) - Sources familiar with the matter have confirmed that Oracle has succesfully beaten back Microsoft, Walmart, and others to secure the buyout of US operations for TikTok. Oracle's victory came as a surprise to many, especially…

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